


the dimples in your back at the bottom of your spine

by Lulu_Horan



Series: Little Things [7]
Category: One Direction (Band]
Genre: Angst, Eating Disorder, Heartbreak, Insecurity, M/M, Starvation, borderline anorexia, louis thinks hes still not good enough
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-09
Updated: 2013-09-09
Packaged: 2017-12-26 03:10:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/960900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lulu_Horan/pseuds/Lulu_Horan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis still isn't good enough and the lads try to convince Liam to move on.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the dimples in your back at the bottom of your spine

**Author's Note:**

> The boys are jerks in this tbh

Louis stepped out of the shower, wrapping himself with a big fluffy towel, and it hurt because it was Liam's (he never did collect his things). Closing his eyes, he convinced himself that he needed to see how much more attractive he'd gotten, and so he looked.

His cheeks were hollowed out, making his cheekbones more prominent, and it was clear that he'd shedded off his stomach and thighs (but he still had back dimples), and just a bit off his bum, but there was still _too much too much too much._

Sighing, and determined to work harder to look better to be good enough for Liam, he went to get dressed for tour rehearsals (and his clothes were loose, but not loose enough). 

When they were finally allowed a lunch break, Louis sat in a corner away from everyone else. His bandmates had taken Liam's side in everything, which just wasn't fair. He knew didn't deserve Liam, but he did deserve friends. 

He pulled out his phone and scrolled through Twitter, responding to and retweeting fans, even following a few (the fans were great, but he really needed a hug).

And of course there was hate (because people don't know how to keep their opinions to themselves) about how awful of a singer he was and he should just go die.

And then there were the real fans, the ones who noticed how rapidly he'd lost weight, and they wondered why. What was compelling their idol to drop so much, so fast? He'd lost too much, they thought (but he knew they were wrong, _not enough not enough not enough_ ).

"–being selfish and he knows it." Niall's voice interrupted his thoughts.

Louis pretended to still be on his phone while listening to his 'friends' talk about him.

"Think about it, mate," Zayn put in. "He's just doing this to keep your attention on him."

"Yeah, don't let him make you feel bad."

"He always just wants all eyes on him, all the time," Harry's slow voice sounded, and Louis thought he might cry. "I mean, you tried to help him, and he insulted you. Louis doesn't appreciate you, mate. You can do so much better than him."

And Louis let out a loud sob at that, making all of them turn and watch him crumble, and it hurt so bad because Harry was his _best mate_ , but he knew, _he knew_ , that Harry was right, but he was so so wrong at the same time.

Louis fled the room, and the building. He hopped into his car and drove to his flat, trying not to fall apart just yet. He put the chain lock on the door behind himself (because Liam still had the key).

He locked himself in the bedroom and _screamed_ as he broke and he wished that he cut or burned or did _something_ (anything, really) to take this pain away, or ease it just a little. _Because really, nothing is more painful than feeling unloved._

**Author's Note:**

> Niall's birthday is in 4 days and mine is in 5 WEYHEY
> 
> twitter: @Nialls5sauce
> 
> tumblr: imnotinlovewitha-leprechaun (even though I'm hardly ever on it oh well)
> 
> kik: luluhoran1
> 
> ~Lulu xx


End file.
